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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22799527">slumbering hours</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/zimtlein/pseuds/zimtlein'>zimtlein</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Awkwardness, Character Study, F/F, F/M, Fan Killing Game (Dangan Ronpa), Fanfiction of Fanfiction, Literal Sleeping Together, Platonic Cuddling, Spoilers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 18:47:41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,624</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22799527</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/zimtlein/pseuds/zimtlein</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Emily can’t sleep. Luckily, she’s not alone.</p><p>A fanfiction for <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Squidgelatinous/pseuds/Squidgelatinous">Squidgelatinous’</a> <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/11159529">Danganronpa: Alternate</a>, exploring its character dynamics.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Original Female Character(s)/Original Male Character(s), Original Female Character/Original Female Character</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>slumbering hours</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Squidgelatinous/gifts">Squidgelatinous</a>.</li>


        <li>
            Inspired by

            <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/11159529">Danganronpa: Alternate</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Squidgelatinous/pseuds/Squidgelatinous">Squidgelatinous</a>.
        </li>

    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Because I didn’t want to spam the tags - this fic contains the following ships:</p><p>Makoto Naegi / Emily Summers<br/>Shinji Ishibashi / Emily Summers<br/>Narumi Nagatsuka / Emily Summers<br/>Kou / Emily Summers</p><p>Please check out Squidgelatinous fantastic fic if you didn’t already (and beware of minimal spoilers in here up to Chapter 3!) - it’s phenomenally written, and its characters are full of surprising depth. I hope I did them justice!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Emily closes her eyes. She doesn’t fall asleep.</p><p>Above her, she hears the sound of even breathing. It’s not fair, she thinks. While Makoto gets her peaceful sleep, Emily is left to lie awake in the darkness, staring at the top of the bunk bed. She sighs, scratches her arm, sighs again.</p><p>It’s not like they won’t ever escape. Tomorrow is a new day, after all. Nobody will listen to that weird bear. No one will start killing anyone. Not even Makoto. As much as she likes to pretend to feel nothing at all, even Makoto has a vulnerable side.</p><p>Emily turns around on her bed.</p><p>They won’t be here forever. That’s impossible. They’ll get out, and everything will be all right. A misunderstanding, that’s all. There’s nothing to fear.</p><p>She turns to her other side.</p><p>And as soon as they finally manage to get out …</p><p>“Could you quit tossing and turning already?”</p><p>Emily freezes. It takes her a few seconds to come up with an answer. “I … Did I wake you up?”</p><p>“No. I’m still sleeping.”</p><p>A pause. Emily doesn’t feel like laughing, not even apologetically. “You know, you could at least try to be a bit sympathetic, couldn’t you?”</p><p>“Sympathetic,” Makoto repeats.</p><p>“Um, yes? Because of, I don’t know, the fact that we are trapped in here?”</p><p>A deep sigh. “I have no sympathy for you. If you just accepted your fate, you wouldn’t need to be that restless.”</p><p>Maybe it would be best to keep quiet. Maybe there is no use in getting worked up. Emily is cold, and her heart is pounding, and she bites her lip. Just when she is sure that Makoto has fallen asleep again, she lets out a shaky breath.</p><p>“I prefer the top, you know,” she whispers to no one.</p><p>It’s dark and quiet. She is used to it. Since the day she first left home, there wasn’t anyone to hold her through restless nights. Faceless people who forgot about her eventually. Always.</p><p>“The top of the bunk bed?” Makoto’s sudden words almost make Emily wince. “Just my luck that you still let me sleep up here then, huh?”</p><p>A somehow dry tone, and Emily knits her eyebrows. “Maybe I can’t sleep in the bottom bunk.”</p><p>Something rustles. Makoto gives a sound. “So?”</p><p>“Maybe you could switch with me.”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>The answer came so promptly that Emily has to suppress a disbelieving sound. Instead, she sits up and tosses the blanket from her. “All right, I’ve had enough of you.”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“You heard me.”</p><p>Armed with her pillow and blanket, Emily surmounts her tiredness and climbs the ladder to Makoto’s bed. The metal squeaks as she does so. Once there, she throws her stuff next to Makoto. She doesn’t wait for a reaction, ignores the stare Makoto sends her, and makes herself comfortable next to the other girl. It’s a bit crammed, but she doesn’t really touch Makoto, and if neither of them moves too much, they’ll be able to sleep all right.</p><p>“What are you doing?” Makoto asks. She sounds oddly calm. As if the outburst didn’t affect her in the slightest. Emily tries her best to not be irritated by her lack of reaction.</p><p>“Sleeping in the top bunk. Duh.”</p><p>A laugh, dark and bitter. “Now what kind of fate brought this upon me?”</p><p>“No kind of fate.” She snorts. “Only you being irritating.”</p><p>“Ah.” Makoto shuffles closer. Still, Emily refuses to move. “But maybe it is? Maybe I’ll find out something interesting.” She’s too close, and Emily presses her hands against her chest, resisting the urge to shove Makoto away from her. She won’t give her the satisfaction of reacting to her weird talking. “Like, a weakness you are trying to hide. A weakness that I could use to …”</p><p>A cold hand on Emily’s waist. She squeaks and whirls around, pushing the hand from her. “Stop that!”</p><p>Something lights up in Makoto’s eyes. “Ah. I get it now.”</p><p>“You get what?”</p><p>Instead of an answer, Emily only receives a chuckle in return. Then Makoto turns away and lets her head sink on her pillow. Emily doesn’t dare do anything other than staring at the back of her head. She counts the seconds, counts her breaths, tries to make her tense body relax.</p><p>She can’t.</p><p>She needs hours until she can finally fall asleep.</p><p> </p><p>Emily closes the door as quietly as possible. She almost jumps when she sees someone else sitting on the floor outside of their room.</p><p>“Shinji?” she asks.</p><p>His eyelids flutter until he looks at her blearily. “Little Lamb. What are you doin’ here?”</p><p>She scratches her cheek and gives a nervous laugh. “Um, so, Makoto was being weird last night. I can’t really fall asleep next to her right now.”</p><p>“Huh.” That seems to get his full attention. “She done something?”</p><p>“No!” Hastily, Emily waves her hands. “Nothing like that. She didn’t try to – no, she was just being weird.”</p><p>“So her usual self, eh.”</p><p>“I guess.” She eyes their environment. “What are you doing here, though?”</p><p>With a sigh, Shinji closes his eyes again. “Won’t believe it, but our favorite actor seems to like reciting his lines even in his goddamn sleep. Got no second of rest ’cause of his ever-so-present voice.”</p><p>She can’t help it. She actually has to giggle.</p><p>“Funny to you, Little Lamb?”</p><p>“Sorry.” She steps closer and sinks to the floor next to him. “But – well. It says a lot about him, doesn’t it?”</p><p>“Might.”</p><p>Emily is tired, she realizes. Her eyes threaten to close. She stirs fully awake again when she hears Shinji’s voice.</p><p>“You think Makoto really could – y’know …”</p><p>The words won’t leave her lips either, and she shrugs. “No. I don’t think so.” She sends him a look. “Barking dogs don’t bite.”</p><p>He laughs. It sounds raspy. “Yeah. Stupid saying, ’cause that’s far from the truth.”</p><p>“So you think …?”</p><p>The ensuing silence is answer enough. Emily shivers and wraps her arms around her knees, pulling them closer. She tries not to think about it. For a brief moment, she feels lonelier than ever before.</p><p>It’s easier to close her eyes than to keep thinking. It’s easier to drown in darkness. There is a source of warmth next to her, after all. The sound of even breathing, the reassurance that no matter what happens, at least someone, anyone is next to her. She is about to fall asleep, and it’s only then that she realizes that her head is resting on Shinji’s shoulder.</p><p>With a surprised squeak, she shoots upwards. Lazily, Shinji turns his head to look at her.</p><p>“Had a nightmare?” he asks.</p><p>“I’m so sorry!” Her cheeks are hot. She resists the urge to cover them with her hands. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep on your shoulder.”</p><p>“I don’t mind, Little Lamb.”</p><p>The pet name only makes things worse. She blushes even harder and tries to escape the way he looks at her. Something flutters in her chest, and she isn’t quite sure what it is.</p><p>They sit in silence. With nothing to lean on, Emily can’t fall asleep. She is drawn to the warmth Shinji gives, to the faint scent of earth surrounding him. So after minutes of mulling it over, she hesitantly lets her head sink onto his shoulder again. Only this time, her heart is pounding so fast she is afraid he might hear it.</p><p>He comments on this with a quirk of his eyebrow.</p><p>She doesn’t return his look.</p><p>It takes her some time to fall asleep for good, and when she does, she is greeted by dreamless darkness.</p><p> </p><p>The words won’t come out, and Emily is still holding onto Narumi’s sleeve. Narumi’s narrowed eyes are on her. Seconds tick by. Emily tries to pull herself together – out with it, get it over with – and before she can duck out for good, she forces herself to say it.</p><p>“Could you – um, could you sleep in my room tonight?”</p><p>Narumi doesn’t move, doesn’t bat an eyelid as Emily lets go of her sleeve. In return, Emily starts to feel somehow ashamed, embarrassed, like a little child about to be scolded.</p><p>“Is this a serious question, Emily Summers?”</p><p>“It is.”</p><p>Narumi seems to study her, eyes still narrowed. “I apologize, but I am not quite following. Why?”</p><p>She should have expected such a blunt question. Still, Emily feels herself flush. “Sleeping alone is, um …  I just …”</p><p>“Perhaps you feel unsafe being on your own?”</p><p>Emily blinks, then quickly proceeds to nod. “That’s, yep. I mean, it’s not like I expect anyone else to be killed, because it won’t happen. Not again. But still. It’s kind of …”</p><p>“I understand.” Narumi looks away, hiding her mouth behind her hand. “As much as I respect Umeko Kuroku, I am not particularly fond of her habit of talking in her sleep.” Then, an icy stare is directed at Emily again. “You don’t have a similar habit you wish to inform me about?”</p><p>“I – I don’t.” At least she thinks she doesn’t.</p><p>“Very well. I accept, then.”</p><p>They are the last ones to go to sleep. Emily is tired enough to get rid of her tie, kick off her shoes, and fall into bed right away. When she turns her head in Narumi’s direction, she sees her unbuckling her belt. Something inside Emily stirs violently, and she sits straight up.</p><p>“Narumi, what – what are you doing?”</p><p>“Preparing for bed.” Narumi shoots her a look that screams “duh”. “Why, Emily Summers, don’t tell me you plan on going to bed fully clothed?”</p><p>Emily clears her throat and gingerly starts removing her thigh highs. “Of course not.”</p><p>She can’t help it. Her eyes catch the sight of Narumi removing her blazer, popping open the first button of her blouse. Another wave of warmth goes through Emily.</p><p>“You aren’t sleeping naked though, are you?” she manages to squeeze out.</p><p>In response, Narumi wrinkles her forehead. “Of course not. I am trying to get as comfortable as possible, seeing as we lack proper sleepwear.”</p><p>Emily sighs and forces herself to lay down. To stop watching Narumi strip in front of her, because why the hell would she? Only when she hears steps, she allows herself to lift her head again. Narumi is about to climb to the top bunk, and Emily stops her before she can do so.</p><p>“Uh, could you … I mean, you don’t have to, but could you …”</p><p>Narumi stares at her. “Please quit speaking in riddles.”</p><p>A pause. Then, hastily and way too quickly, “Could you please sleep next to me? If you don’t mind. If you want to, I mean.”</p><p>Another pause. Narumi regards her, longer, until Emily feels her whole face blaze up with heat. Eventually, Narumi moves closer. “I don’t mind.”</p><p>Emily feels like she should thank her, but she can’t. Instead, she has to turn away and hide her still hot face as Narumi climbs in next to her. Rustling, shifting, until it becomes quiet, Narumi’s breath close to her. Even though she feels comfortable, Emily’s stomach is in knots. She can’t even close her eyes properly without her heart doing jumps.</p><p>Then, suddenly, an arm wraps around Emily’s waist.</p><p>A surprised sound escapes her. At her reaction, the arm quickly disappears again, leaving her with an odd feeling of emptiness. “Why,” she starts, turning her head to look at Narumi.</p><p>“I apologize.” Narumi’s eyes are glazed over, her lips quivering the tiniest bit, and with shock Emily realizes that the woman next to her is embarrassed. Narumi of all people – entirely embarrassed. “I must admit that while I have heard about the concept of ‘spooning’, I have never acted it out before.”</p><p>“Spooning?” Emily repeats, her voice an octave too high.</p><p>“Yes. I realize now that it might have been inappropriate.”</p><p>“Inappropriate,” Emily repeats again, because her brain can’t really work out anything else.</p><p>“I will not do so again. Again, I –”</p><p>“I don’t mind,” Emily manages at last, her voice a shaky whisper.</p><p>Seconds pass. Narumi’s arm is hovering in the air. In the darkness, she is unable to see it, but Emily believes Narumi’s cheeks have turned pink.</p><p>“Shall I …”</p><p>Emily nods. She can’t look at Narumi anymore as warm skin touches her, palpable through the thin fabric of her blouse. Her heart is threatening to burst through her chest.</p><p>“If you want to spoon me properly,” she mumbles into the sheets, “you’ll have to come closer to me.”</p><p>“I … I will do so.”</p><p>It takes Narumi some time to scoot closer. There’s hesitation in the way she rests her head next to Emily’s. Her breath meets Emily’s neck, washing over her skin in prickling excitement. Her body is warm, and she smells of peaches.</p><p>“So you seem to have experience with ‘spooning’.” Narumi still says it like it’s a foreign word sticking to her tongue.</p><p>“Honestly? I don’t.” She swallows down the lump in her throat. “I’ve never … Well, it’s hard to maintain relationships of any kind when you journey around that much, so there never … There was no spoonage. Ever.”</p><p>“Ah.” A sound that could almost be amusement. “I am glad, then.”</p><p>Emily can’t ask why, so she closes her eyes. Despite her hammering heart, she manages to fall asleep.</p><p> </p><p>Emily expected the hallway connecting the dorms to be empty. When she sees a familiar face though, she involuntarily gasps. Their eyes meet – or at least she thinks they do, because as always, Kou’s eyes are hidden behind his sunglasses.</p><p>“Emily? What are you doing here?”</p><p>She looks around, but of course no one else is here. Then she steps closer. “I could ask you the same! What are you doing here?”</p><p>“Uhm.” There is something sheepish about his expression. Sometimes she wishes she could just tear those glasses off his face and look into his eyes properly. “I wanted to give Akira a little space. You know, after …” He clears his throat. “And since Tatsuaki’s roommate was Shinji, well … Their room is empty.”</p><p>That’s true. So many dead people. Enough so that a whole room is free. Enough so that there are only so few of them left.</p><p>“What about you?” Kou asks. His voice has turned soft.</p><p>“Do you want the truth or a nice lie?” Her attempt at a self-deprecating smile fails, and she looks at her hands instead.</p><p>A few seconds of silence. When she looks at Kou, a small smile tugs at his lips. “Both. Let me guess which one is true.”</p><p>“I’m secretly obsessed with midnight snacks.” No matter how hard she tries, she just can’t smile. She feels like crying. “I can’t sleep. Not in an empty room.”</p><p>His smile falls. It’s depressing, and she can’t stand it. With a sigh, she wants to turn around, but a hand on her arm holds her back. As fast as he took hold of her, he lets go again.</p><p>“Maybe we could – uhm, we could share a room. Just … So we both feel safer, too.”</p><p>A funny feeling plays in her stomach, a feeling that creeped up to her numerous times before, and she glances at the now vacant room close to them. “You think Monokuma would allow this? A boy and a girl sleeping in the same room?”</p><p>Seeing Kou – usually composed Kou – fidget before her ignites a feeling of odd satisfaction inside her. Drives away any other thought. She even manages a smile.</p><p>“I was kidding,” she clarifies. “Thank you. I think I can really use some company.”</p><p>He clears his throat. “You’re welcome.”</p><p>The room is empty. Not surprising. It’s like neither Shinji nor Tatsuaki ever existed. An eerie thought. One that makes her knees quiver the tiniest bit. One that makes her chest constrict. She didn’t notice she is staring at the empty wardrobe until Kou’s voice makes her wince.</p><p>“Are you okay, Emily?”</p><p>“Yes! I’m fine.” She can’t let herself think like this. Not anymore. She can’t let herself go there. So she finally beams at him. “Really.”</p><p>He looks at her. Again, his shades conceal whatever emotion is shimmering in his eyes. He’s already in the bottom bunk, and she thinks it’s the first time she sees him without his hoodie pulled over his head. Her smile still in place, Emily turns off the light. A clacking sound seems to affirm that he finally took off his sunglasses.</p><p>She is dying to know what exactly lies underneath them.</p><p>“I know it’s difficult,” he says while she is taking off her shoes, loosening her tie. “That’s why you really don’t have to pretend.” Her hoodie follows, landing on the floor with a thump. Kou’s voice hitches for a split second. “We’ll have to stay optimistic, but no one can blame you if –”</p><p>His voice breaks off. Without a moment of hesitation, she tugs herself under the sheets next to him. It’s a narrow space, and he is unable to escape as she leans over him, inspecting his face. There is nothing unusual about his eyes, she notices. She wishes she could see their color. In the darkness, she can’t even make out whether they are dark or light.</p><p>“Uhm, Emily?” He sounds nervous. It instills a feeling of power in her, trickling down to her very fingertips. Only slowly, she backs away again. Their bodies are so close she can feel his heat on her skin. His breathing is fast. Even her own heart starts to flutter.</p><p>“Is there a reason you always were those sunglasses?” she asks.</p><p>A blink. His eyebrows shooting up. “I dunno. I think I … Maybe I am just used to it.”</p><p>“Right. Our memories. Hm.” It would be nice to see the color of his cheeks, but she doesn’t dare get up to turn the light on. She suspects it would ruin whatever atmosphere has taken over. Rather, she purses her lips. “You remember what Monokuma said? That we all spent time together before our memories were taken.”</p><p>Kou scoots away the slightest bit, keeps looking into her eyes. “Yes. I do. He could very well have lied about this, though.”</p><p>“Do you think so?”</p><p>With his mussed hair and his vigilant look, Emily thinks he looks oddly cute. If not handsome. It’s not like that thought is embarrassing at all.</p><p>“I’m not sure. Whoever took my memories must have obviously messed up, though. If it wasn’t on purpose, that is.”</p><p>She doesn’t want to look away from him. There is something comforting about his presence, something that puts her mind at ease, and the words escape her before she can hold them back. “Do you think we were friends?”</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“During that year we have no memories of. Do you think we were friends?”</p><p>He regards her. She starts feeling hot underneath his gaze, and she isn’t exactly sure why. “Sure. I think all of us were friends.”</p><p>She nods. “Do you think,” she begins. Tries again, “Do you think that some of us, maybe …” Her fingertips turn cold. She doesn’t allow her courage to leave her. Not yet. “Do you think some of us … dated?”</p><p>“Uhm,” is the only sound he makes.</p><p>She can’t stop pushing, though. Not now. Even though her face becomes unbearably warm and her heart beats against her ribcage. “Do you think, maybe, that <em>we</em> dated?”</p><p>Silence. Kou keeps staring at her. She feels her heartbeat up to her throat. She almost has to laugh, and a feeling of lightheadedness makes her slide the tiniest bit closer to him. He doesn’t back away.</p><p>“Just hypothetically,” she adds.</p><p>“Hypothetically,” he repeats, studying her like a case he can’t quite crack. “I don’t … I don’t know.”</p><p>“Huh.” She props herself on her elbows, leans over him. She has never seen that kind of panic on his face before. It’s endearing, somehow. “Sometimes, certain actions bring up forgotten memories, right? We could try, if you want to.”</p><p>“Try?”</p><p>She wonders how much more it would reveal, being closer to him than ever before. She wonders if there is something to Kou she can discover all on her own.</p><p>Then again, it would require a kind of courage she isn’t sure she possesses.</p><p>With a quiet laugh, she sinks down again and stares at the top bunk above them. When she turns her head, she finds Kou still looking at her. She wishes she could see more of his expression. She wishes no darkness would conceal whatever emotion is dancing through his eyes.</p><p>“I am kidding,” she says. “Sorry. It’s fun to tease you.”</p><p>He clears his throat and looks away from her. “Tease me, huh.”</p><p>“Oh, now don’t be embarrassed.” She grins at him, even though he can’t see it. “I bet if we had been dating, I would have been the one wearing the pants in the relationship.”</p><p>“Not impossible.” He turns his back to her. His bashful tone urges her on even more, and she pokes his arm.</p><p>“I mean, would it be that bad? Dating me.” She pokes again. “I don’t think it would. Right?”</p><p>“I don’t think so either,” he mumbles, barely audible.</p><p>It isn’t an answer she didn’t expect, and yet she feels her heart give a wild thump. “See. I knew it.”</p><p>Feeling hot all over, she turns to her side until they are back to back. She moves around, trying to find a better position, and feels her legs brush his. He doesn’t flinch away. She doesn’t either.</p><p>There’s so much left unsaid, and no word leaves her lips. Maybe, she thinks, when all of this is over, they will have more time. More chances. Maybe then, there will be a chance to discover all there is to him.</p><p>Before she knows it, she has drifted off to sleep.</p>
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